Tuesday, May 14, 2013
The Fog...
Almost 7 months ago I gave birth to my wonderful little boy, Joey, and began a great adventure. I knew that there were going to be difficult times after labor...from pain and healing to hormone changes to difficulties with breastfeeding. I even knew about the baby blues. Despite how "knowledgeable" or "prepared" I thought I was, nothing prepared me for what I affectionately called
I have talked about The Fog with friends and family, and I've learned more about this since I've emerged from it, but it is still something that I feel plagues new moms but is not really talked about.
I'm talking about living through postpartum depression.
There is a long history of mental issues in my family, including but not limited to depression. I knew that since I already suffered from mild depression I was at a greater risk of suffering from postpartum depression. Many moms have issues after childbirth as their hormones try to balance out again. Those first couple of weeks are called the baby blues and usually involve some crying, irritability, nervousness, anxiety, etc. After about 2 weeks though, the hormones figure themselves out and other than being more tired than you ever thought possible, you're good. When those 2 weeks have come and gone and things are not "getting better," basically that's postpartum depression (PPD).
I am so thankful that I knew going into this time in my life that PPD was a possibility for me and had solutions in place before I gave birth. But even knowing all of that, I did not know what it would actually FEEL like. Like I was drowning. Like I had made the biggest mistake of my life and couldn't go back. Like I was a terrible mother. Like nothing would ever be good or happy again. Unable to eat. Hopeless. Sad.
Writing some of those things now seems so unreal and strange because I am very far from that mindset but I can also remember those feelings very well. Knowing this was a possibility allowed me to be prepared and thankfully helped me emerge from the fog faster than I probably would have had I not sought help. The experience has given me a new compassion and understanding for new moms and a great desire to reach out to those experiencing PPD and the baby blues.
Here are some of the most important things I learned about those early days of motherhood and dealing with PPD:
1. You are not alone and you are not the first woman to go through this!
2. Everything you're feeling is completely normal.
3. It is important to reach out and be honest to those around you. Especially other moms...you probably know someone who experienced the same thing you are but just never talked about it.
4. Knowledge is power. Find some books or articles online about the baby blues/PPD. Just reading that the stuff you are going through is expected and normal helps you not feel so crazy.
5. Figure out what one thing you don't want to live without each day and make it happen. Eating breakfast, browsing things online, reading, showering, having your daily coffee/soda, etc. For me, it was showering. I was committed to showering everyday so I made it happen. Whatever I needed to do with my son so I could get in the shower, I did it. And if he cried the whole time I was in there, he cried. But it kept me sane so I made it a priority.
6. You might need counseling, especially if you don't have a good network of people around you offering support. That's OK! I'm a firm believer that everyone could use a little counseling.
7. Sometimes the body just can't balance itself out and you need some extra assistance (i.e. medication). It's what worked for me and has made me a better mom. Don't be afraid to help your body out a little if it needs it.
BOTTOM LINE: Motherhood & Labor can be some of the most wonderful experiences and some of the most difficult experiences of your life. Don't be ashamed of the fact that your body has been through some trauma and might take a little longer than you expected to recover. Your number one goal should be to become the the healthiest you can be...THAT is what will make you a great mom!!!
The Fog.
I have talked about The Fog with friends and family, and I've learned more about this since I've emerged from it, but it is still something that I feel plagues new moms but is not really talked about.
I'm talking about living through postpartum depression.
There is a long history of mental issues in my family, including but not limited to depression. I knew that since I already suffered from mild depression I was at a greater risk of suffering from postpartum depression. Many moms have issues after childbirth as their hormones try to balance out again. Those first couple of weeks are called the baby blues and usually involve some crying, irritability, nervousness, anxiety, etc. After about 2 weeks though, the hormones figure themselves out and other than being more tired than you ever thought possible, you're good. When those 2 weeks have come and gone and things are not "getting better," basically that's postpartum depression (PPD).
I am so thankful that I knew going into this time in my life that PPD was a possibility for me and had solutions in place before I gave birth. But even knowing all of that, I did not know what it would actually FEEL like. Like I was drowning. Like I had made the biggest mistake of my life and couldn't go back. Like I was a terrible mother. Like nothing would ever be good or happy again. Unable to eat. Hopeless. Sad.
Writing some of those things now seems so unreal and strange because I am very far from that mindset but I can also remember those feelings very well. Knowing this was a possibility allowed me to be prepared and thankfully helped me emerge from the fog faster than I probably would have had I not sought help. The experience has given me a new compassion and understanding for new moms and a great desire to reach out to those experiencing PPD and the baby blues.
Here are some of the most important things I learned about those early days of motherhood and dealing with PPD:
1. You are not alone and you are not the first woman to go through this!
2. Everything you're feeling is completely normal.
3. It is important to reach out and be honest to those around you. Especially other moms...you probably know someone who experienced the same thing you are but just never talked about it.
4. Knowledge is power. Find some books or articles online about the baby blues/PPD. Just reading that the stuff you are going through is expected and normal helps you not feel so crazy.
5. Figure out what one thing you don't want to live without each day and make it happen. Eating breakfast, browsing things online, reading, showering, having your daily coffee/soda, etc. For me, it was showering. I was committed to showering everyday so I made it happen. Whatever I needed to do with my son so I could get in the shower, I did it. And if he cried the whole time I was in there, he cried. But it kept me sane so I made it a priority.
6. You might need counseling, especially if you don't have a good network of people around you offering support. That's OK! I'm a firm believer that everyone could use a little counseling.
7. Sometimes the body just can't balance itself out and you need some extra assistance (i.e. medication). It's what worked for me and has made me a better mom. Don't be afraid to help your body out a little if it needs it.
BOTTOM LINE: Motherhood & Labor can be some of the most wonderful experiences and some of the most difficult experiences of your life. Don't be ashamed of the fact that your body has been through some trauma and might take a little longer than you expected to recover. Your number one goal should be to become the the healthiest you can be...THAT is what will make you a great mom!!!
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Saturday Confessions
Confession is good for the soul. So as I sit here watching "The Voice" and listening to my husband snore on the other couch, let me lay out some confessions for ya...
1. I am very vocal about how dumb I think "The Bachelor" & "Bachellorette" series are but almost every season I will secretly watch the final 3 or 4 episodes just to see how it all played out.
2. I make up lots and lots of songs to sing to Joey. Some are better than others but my favorite is a remake of "O Christmas Tree." It's pretty awesome.
3. While I remain adamant that we are NOT getting a dog any time soon, I am starting to be really excited about getting one. I will never admit that to Greg though and since he doesn't really read my blog, I think my secret is safe.
4. Cookies are becoming a dangerous obsession. I buy the break-and-bake snickerdoodle cookies and bake usually 5 or 6 at a time. I will then inhale said cookies in about 5 minutes...maybe. Usually faster. I have a problem.
5. I take so many pictures and videos of Joey that I have to actually tell myself out-loud during the day to put the phone down and actually just enjoy the moment. The Halloween episode of "Up All Night" was actually convicting to me...while also being incredibly funny. In my defense, look at how cute!
1. I am very vocal about how dumb I think "The Bachelor" & "Bachellorette" series are but almost every season I will secretly watch the final 3 or 4 episodes just to see how it all played out.
2. I make up lots and lots of songs to sing to Joey. Some are better than others but my favorite is a remake of "O Christmas Tree." It's pretty awesome.
3. While I remain adamant that we are NOT getting a dog any time soon, I am starting to be really excited about getting one. I will never admit that to Greg though and since he doesn't really read my blog, I think my secret is safe.
4. Cookies are becoming a dangerous obsession. I buy the break-and-bake snickerdoodle cookies and bake usually 5 or 6 at a time. I will then inhale said cookies in about 5 minutes...maybe. Usually faster. I have a problem.
5. I take so many pictures and videos of Joey that I have to actually tell myself out-loud during the day to put the phone down and actually just enjoy the moment. The Halloween episode of "Up All Night" was actually convicting to me...while also being incredibly funny. In my defense, look at how cute!
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Mixing it up...Kitchen style
Every two weeks I prepare a meal plan for the next two weeks. It's a great system that allows me to know what I'm going to cook and exactly what I need to buy when I go to the grocery store. I have a list of meals that I've made and enjoyed but after a while things can get a little repetitive. So, a month ago I decided to shake things up by adding some new recipes to the mix.
I've had a Pinterest board called "Mmmm...food to try" for a L-O-N-G time and have only tried one recipe. So I went back to the board and searched for some good looking recipes. These are what I came up with that turned out good (there was one that was very very bad...I will not share that one here).
I've had a Pinterest board called "Mmmm...food to try" for a L-O-N-G time and have only tried one recipe. So I went back to the board and searched for some good looking recipes. These are what I came up with that turned out good (there was one that was very very bad...I will not share that one here).
Thursday, March 28, 2013
#7 CHECK!!!!
Not sure why this goal took so long to complete, but I am happy to say that I can finally check off...
7. Surprise Greg with a random gift for a random reason
I think the delay has to do with the "for a random reason" part. I have bought Greg lots of gifts but they were all for a legit reason.
Not this time though!
Taking a cue from amazing wife & friend, Lindsay, I decided to bless Greg with the one thing that made him cry more in 2012 than the birth of our son.
That's right. I bought Greg "Les Miserables." I enjoyed the movie, but I was not moved to my core like Greg was. Greg spent days singing the soundtrack before and after he saw the movie so I knew that he would be happy. And since it was just a random Wednesday, I think that counts as a random reason.
Special thanks to my partner in crime who helped push me to get the blu-ray version.
7. Surprise Greg with a random gift for a random reason
I think the delay has to do with the "for a random reason" part. I have bought Greg lots of gifts but they were all for a legit reason.
Not this time though!
Taking a cue from amazing wife & friend, Lindsay, I decided to bless Greg with the one thing that made him cry more in 2012 than the birth of our son.
That's right. I bought Greg "Les Miserables." I enjoyed the movie, but I was not moved to my core like Greg was. Greg spent days singing the soundtrack before and after he saw the movie so I knew that he would be happy. And since it was just a random Wednesday, I think that counts as a random reason.
Special thanks to my partner in crime who helped push me to get the blu-ray version.
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